adBlockCheck

8 Of The Hottest Celebs Without Their Flesh

Top Headlines

Recent News

Voyager Probe Badly Damaged After Smashing Into End Of Universe

PASADENA, CA—Confirming that several components had broken off the craft and that most of its scientific instruments were no longer operational, officials from NASA’s Jet Propulsion Laboratory announced that Voyager 1, the pioneering space probe launched in 1977, had been severely damaged Thursday after crashing into the end of the universe.

Leaked Documents Reveal Studio Executives Knew About ‘Gods Of Egypt’ Before It Released Onto Public

SANTA MONICA, CA—Suggesting that the disastrous events of three months ago could have been averted, federal investigators stated Wednesday that a trove of leaked documents confirmed high-ranking studio executives had full knowledge of Gods Of Egypt long before the film was released onto unsuspecting Americans.Investigators described those who allowed such a screenplay to be carried out as “extremely sick and heartless individuals.”

Books Vs. E-Readers

Though e-readers have increasingly supplanted books in the digital age, many bibliophiles defend the importance of physical texts. Here is a side-by-side comparison of physical books and e-books

The Arguments For And Against Bernie Sanders Staying In The Race

Bernie Sanders is ramping up his efforts in the presidential race despite long odds, while sharpening his criticisms of a Democratic Party increasingly focused on the general election with Hillary Clinton as their presumptive nominee. Here are the arguments for and against Sanders staying in the race

Report: Nobody Fucking Cares

NEW YORK—According to a brief but conclusive report released Monday, nobody fucking cares. “Doesn’t fucking matter,” read the report in part, which went on to inform readers that no one gives two shits, so fuck it.

Mom Sleeps In Past Sunrise

WOBURN, MA―Noting that she had somehow managed to sleep through both the dawn chorus of birds and her neighborhood’s early morning garbage pickup, 53-year-old local mother Laura Maloney confirmed that she did not awaken Monday until after the sun had risen.
End Of Section
  • More News
Up Next

8 Of The Hottest Celebs Without Their Flesh

Dermal papillae, schmermal papillae—Mila Kunis doesn’t need an epidermis to turn heads. This perennial sex kitten sizzles in this casual, flesh-free look.
K-Stew, is that you? This stunning screen siren looks more pooped than perky without her trademark subcutaneous tissue and dermis. Kristen nails it when she gets dolled up, but without her mucus membranes and malar pads, this bombshell beauty made a major faux pas.
Explain to us how this Latina starlet looks better without her flesh. Un. Fair. Eva Mendes dazzles in nothing but bone and cardiac muscle. Mix those genes with some Gosling, and we can’t wait to see the dermis on that baby.
If this is what 34 and pregnant looks like, we can’t hardly wait to see how this fabulous former teen heartthrob looks when she hits the big 4-0! Even in nothing but her skeletal striated muscles, you can’t deny Jennifer Love Hewitt’s a timeless beauty.
Even Hollywood’s most fit and fabulous stars opt to go without skin every once in a while! Case in point: Beyoncé and Jay Z, fresh-faced and fleshless in Brooklyn.
Proud papa Liev Schrieber teaching his son that real men are comfortable skinless.
At 78 years old, wearing skin isn’t something Dame Dench worries about anymore.

Sign up For The Onion's Newsletter

Give your spam filter something to do.

X Close