adBlockCheck

Entertainment

How Movies Receive Their Ratings

Many Americans use the MPAA’s formalized rating system as a guide for which films to see. The Onion provides a step-by-step view into how these ratings are chosen:

‘Winnie-The-Pooh’ Turns 90

Winnie-The-Pooh, the A.A. Milne series featuring a stuffed bear and his toy animal friends, debuted 90 years ago this week. Here are some milestones from the franchise’s nearly century-long run:
End Of Section
  • More News

8 Photos Of You, The Reader

This is you.
You think you’re special? You think you matter? You’re fucking dirt and that’s all you’ll ever be.
“Oh, I’m just going to click through this slideshow like every other person because I do whatever I’m told and I can’t think for myself. Maybe I’ll follow all the other cows up this slaughterhouse ramp.” You fucking idiot.
This is what you are to us. Just a goddamn number to plug into a spreadsheet—nothing more, nothing less.
How does it feel to finally see yourself like everyone else sees you? Hideous, forsaken, and detested.
Here, again, is you. A big, stupid dummy being jerked around on strings by all those who seek to manipulate you, including us.
It’s very hard to see you in this photo. Why? Because in the grand of scheme of things, you are nothing but a tiny, pitiful, insignificant speck in the cosmos.
This is you, soon enough. No one will notice when you’re gone.

WATCH VIDEO FROM THE ONION

Sign up For The Onion's Newsletter

Give your spam filter something to do.

Close