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Scientology Minister Accused Of Molesting Thetans

The Church of Scientology plunged into scandal Thursday when Frank D. Linehan, a prominent minister who has helped thousands of parishioners move up the Bridge to Total Freedom and achieve Clear, was arrested on 471 charges of molesting alien thetans.

Stunned Adam Schefter Receives Ominous Tip From Future Self

BRISTOL, CT—Slowly returning to his desk shaken and confused, sources reported Wednesday that ESPN NFL Insider Adam Schefter was stunned to receive an ominous tip from his future self while walking through one of his office building’s hallways.

Infographic: 20 Years Of Netflix

Netflix was founded as an online DVD rental service in 1997 and has since evolved into a subscription-based streaming platform with its own slate of original programming. The Onion looks back at the most important moments in the company’s 20-year history.

Musical The Kind With Number About Putting On A Show

TALLAHASSEE, FL—Noting the increasingly animated choreography and behavior of the characters on stage, sources at the Tallahassee Community Theatre reported Friday that this is apparently the kind of musical with a big number about putting on a show.

What To Watch For In The New Obi-Wan Kenobi Film

Disney has announced they are in the early stages of developing a stand-alone ‘Star Wars’ film focused on the adventures of Jedi master Obi-Wan Kenobi. Here’s what fans can expect to see in the upcoming release.
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A Complete History Of Art

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Unknown - Venus of Willendorf

Discovered in 1908 in Austria, this paleolithic carving from 24,000 BCE represents one of the earliest examples of the human figure known to modern scholars.

Alexandros of Antioch - Venus de Milo

Created sometime between 130 and 100 BCE, the Venus de Milo is considered one of the quintessential examples of ancient Greek sculpture.

Michaelangelo - The Fall From Grace (Detail of Eve)

This figure is one of more than 300 painted by Michelangelo on the ceiling of the Sistine Chapel, regarded as one of the most celebrated artworks of the High Renaissance.

Vincent van Gogh - Nude Woman Reclining

The Post-Impressionistic style pioneered by Dutch painter Vincent van Gogh was considered revolutionary at the time.

Edgar Degas - Woman Drying Herself

Impressionist Edgar Degas was unique among his peers for preferring to work in pastel instead of oil paint.

Man Ray - Untitled (Natasha)

Surrealist photographer Man Ray used a technique called solarization to lend his portraits a stark, metallic quality as well as a distinctive aura effect.

Salvador Dali - Honey Is Sweeter Than Blood

Though not at the peak of his surrealist powers, Dali nonetheless brought his genius for detail and dream imagery to this 1941 masterpiece.

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