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Man Hoping Game Gets Out Of Hand So He Can Do Something Else

DENVER—Settling into his apartment’s cramped living room to watch the midday game, local man Garrett Neubauer told reporters Wednesday that he hoped the televised baseball game between the Colorado Rockies and the San Francisco Giants would get out of hand soon so he could do something else.

20 Years Of Harry Potter

J.K. Rowling published ‘Harry Potter And The Philosopher’s Stone’ on June 26th, 1997, and it instantly became a cultural touchstone. The Onion looks back at the most important moments in the 20-year history of the Harry Potter franchise.

Pros And Cons Of The Gig Economy

Americans are increasingly using on-demand services, both as workers and consumers. Here are the major benefits and drawbacks of the gig economy.
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In God We Trust: The All-Time Sexiest Dimes

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This little stunner might only be 1/10 of a dollar, but she’s got 100% of our attention.
This baby must be fresh out of the mint because it’s scorching hot.
91.67% copper. Voluptuous 17-millimeter frame. Um, is it hot in here, or is it just us?
Just think: Some lucky bastard gets to walk around with this sultry specimen in his pocket.
It’s hard not to be jealous of this timeless beauty. Sixty-seven years old and this dime still rocks a killer figure. Case in point: those gorgeous denticles.
The U.S. Mint must have had sex on the brain when they printed this dime. How can you explain that knockout rim and swoon-worthy bas-relief?
If the tails side of this dime is as sexy as its obverse side, you can bet we’re going to go crazy on this dime.
Is it wrong to fantasize about bedding this dime?
The quintessential dime next door. Olive branch + torch + oak branch = we need a cold shower.
Sorry, folks, but this dime is taken.

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