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Man Holding Hands With Pregnant Woman Must Have Weird Fetish

RED BANK, NJ—Testing the limits of what even the most progressive onlookers considered publicly acceptable, a man was seen by multiple witnesses Tuesday holding hands with a visibly pregnant woman in what many could only interpret as the expression of a bizarre fetish.

Grandma Looking Like Absolute Shit Lately

VERO BEACH, FL—Unable to ignore the 86-year-old’s dramatic physical decline since they last saw her, sources within the Delahunt family reported Monday that their grandmother Shirley is looking like absolute shit lately.
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Our Towns

Desperate Small Town Erects World's Largest Fiberglass Chili Dog
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Couple's Divorce Stuns Tight-Knit Community Of Manhattan
Man With Shirt Off Terrifies Community
Community Rallies Behind Struggling Corporation
18-Year-Old Miraculously Finds Soulmate In Hometown

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