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What Is Trump’s Relationship With White Nationalism?

Since the weekend’s violent protests in Charlottesville, VA, many have criticized President Trump for his failure to outright condemn the white supremacists involved. The Onion breaks down Trump’s relationship to this powerful hate group.

Ruth Bader Ginsburg Returns To Off-Season Lifeguarding Job

ALEXANDRIA, VA—Saying she hadn’t missed a summer since she was on the U.S. Court of Appeals, Supreme Court Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg said Tuesday that she had once again returned to her off-season lifeguarding job at Splash Central waterpark.

President’s American Manufacturing Council Down To CEO Of Shoe Carnival

WASHINGTON—Following a series of resignations from prominent CEOs amid the fallout from President Trump’s handling of white-nationalist violence in Charlottesville, VA, White House sources confirmed Tuesday that Trump’s American Manufacturing Council is now down to a single member, Clifton Sifford, CEO and president of Shoe Carnival.

Contents Of The Voyager Golden Record

Forty years ago this week, NASA launched Voyager 2, which carries a gold-plated record featuring pictures and sounds from Earth as well as scientific information, all of which was carefully compiled in anticipation of a possible extraterrestrial encounter. Here are the contents of the record:
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Those We Should Have Lost In 2012

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Northern Sportive Lemur: Scientists aren’t sure how these primates have held on for so long. This guy should have kicked the bucket already.
Grandpa Jerry: He is 94 and just sitting on a big pile of money he’s not doing anything with. Come on, already.
Neil Armstrong’s Wife: Only because it would have been poetic, you know?
Guy Crossing Street In Traffic: Who does he think he his? Lucky he didn’t get himself killed.
Michael Clarke Duncan: What’s that? He did die? That’s too bad.
Sgt. Nicholas Brody: Homeland writers so could have killed him off. They know they could have. Would have made the show much better, too. But they pussied out. Of course.
Me: It should have been me. It should have been me!
Danny: After he knocked Dad’s camera off the table and broke it, we all thought he was going to be dead meat.

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