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Top 10 Most Adorable Dogs!

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Obama Resigns From Presidency After Michelle Lands Dream Job In Seattle

‘It’s Time I Made Some Sacrifices For This Family,’ Reports President

WASHINGTON—Saying his wife of 24 years had already sacrificed so much for the sake of his career and that it was time to return the favor, Barack Obama announced Wednesday his resignation as president of the United States of America, effective immediately, following news that Michelle Obama had landed her dream job in Seattle.

High School Nurse Getting Pretty Good At Spotting Morning Sickness

FAIRFIELD, ME―Having seen more students than she can remember come into her office with complaints of nausea and vomiting over the years, Fairfield High School nurse Sarah Bromti told reporters Wednesday she’s getting to the point where she can identify morning sickness without much trouble.

Jogger Clearly On First Run Of Plan To Turn Life Around

CHICAGO—Taking note of the man’s beat-up tennis shoes, sweat-drenched shirt, and ill-fitting pair of sweatpants as he made his way down the sidewalk, witnesses reported Tuesday that area jogger Dan Andreychuk was clearly out on his very first run of a plan to turn his life around.

What’s At Stake In New Hampshire

With the New Hampshire primary election Tuesday poised to impact the course of the 2016 presidential race, The Onion examines what’s at stake for the candidates
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Top 10 Most Adorable Dogs!

Adorable! This cute little lady doesn’t even know she’ll have to be put down in a year due to the ittiest-bittiest little bone cancer.
Somebody wants a nice ol’ belly rub! Better give him one now—none of these big guys ever see their 8th birthdays.
Awwww…who has bilateral hip dysplasia?
Who’s a good boy who only has three years left? You’re a good boy who only has three years left! Yes you are!
Woof! Woof! Good ol’ Buster wouldn’t be so happy if he knew about all the heartworms in his chest.
Don’t you worry your head about this guy; he’s just taking a little doggy nap!
Don’t you just want to snuggle up with that little furry face? You’ve got 15 months. Clock’s ticking. By the way, that dog in the previous image was dead.
Television legend Alan Alda sure isn’t a dog, but he’s already 77! We give old Hawkeye eight more years, tops!
This sweetheart just had a birthday! Hope you got a big ol’ bone for the occasion, lil’ missy—we’re thinking it’ll probably be your last!
Cute. The mother will die Nov. 8, 2014. Other death dates are listed from left to right. Puppy #1 (Aug. 24, 2019, cancer), Puppy #2 (Sept. 4, 2022, uncontrollable epilepsy), Puppy #3 (tomorrow, car), Puppy #4 (tomorrow, same car).

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