ELLENSBURG, WA—Claiming that the introspective practice has completely changed his life, local man Simon Trimur told reporters Wednesday that his daily meditation routine was really helping him stay self-centered.
NEW YORK—Saying it was hard not to unfavorably compare himself to his peers, part-time catering assistant Ian Presser, 26, told reporters Thursday that he feels self-conscious after always seeing his friends fail slightly less than him.
MILL VALLEY, CA—Noting that there are dozens of awful aspects of his personality that he hasn’t even begun to address, sources confirmed Monday that local 28-year-old Ryan Glass’ constant self-deprecation only scratches the surface of how truly pathetic he is.
PITTSBURGH—Renewing her intention to cut back a little and only log onto the social network a few times a week at most, area woman Kathy Ward reportedly celebrated her fourth anniversary Tuesday of weaning herself off Facebook.
MANASSAS, VA—Noting that he’s frequently anxious and embarrassed by his most minor personality quirks and modest physical imperfections, sources confirmed Thursday that local sales associate Walter Markowitz is self-conscious about the complet...
CHICAGO—A study released Thursday by the University of Chicago’s Department of Psychology has found that debilitating self-pity is the most effective strategy to win back the love of a former romantic partner.
ALBANY, NY—In what impressed coworkers are describing as an unprecedented application of minimal exertion, local office worker Doug Slater is reportedly just about pushing himself to the point of basic effort, sources confirmed Monday.
SPOKANE, WA—Ten months after altering her interests, appearance, behavior, and opinions to please her boyfriend, Michael Gartner, local woman Gabrielle McMullen is now enjoying a happy, lasting relationship with her long-term partner, the cheerful 2...