NEW HAVEN, CT—A new report released Wednesday by a privately funded think tank revealed that local receptionist Amanda Berley, 31, has the best friends in the whole world. The report, which compared Berley's friends to a wide sampling of similar gr...
MONESSEN, PA—Recreational cyclist Ethan Coseglia, 38, thoroughly explained the benefits of wearing $35 bike-riding socks to his friend Kevin Washburn Friday, saying that his specially designed socks are essential in optimizing his overall cycling performance.
ATLANTA—"It's like everything had shifted," Eric Phipps said. "All of a sudden, I was stopping by his cubicle to ask about his woodworking project, and he was at mine giving me the name of a good chiropractor my sister should try for her back spasms. Then somehow I suddenly had his personal e-mail address."
Just Like Everything Else!: Fox
8 p.m. EDT/7 p.m. ABC
Pete's wife is still on him about building that darn shed, these kids are going to be the death of Sheila and Dave, and the hot next-door neighbor is up in EVERYBODY'S business! Sunday nights on ABC couldn't be any more familiar!
RED BANK, NJ—After watching the 11-year-old give up the fourth straight double that inning, sources confirmed Sunday afternoon that local Little League pitcher Dustin Bauer is getting absolutely fucking shelled out there.
LYNN, MA—Explaining that it’s highly suspicious for such prejudice to be present in every aspect of society by mere coincidence, local 31-year-old Peter Dowling, an avid conspiracy theorist, told reporters Thursday that he is beginning to beli...