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Family Chooses Different Dog Than Reincarnated Grandfather

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Dog Doesn’t Consider Itself Part Of Family

THOMASVILLE, GA—While admitting that he relies on members of the family for food and shelter and is often included in household activities and family photographs, local 6-year-old golden retriever Pepper told reporters Friday that he in no way consi...

Nitro Expected To Win Westminster Dog Fight

NEW YORK—Lauding his sturdy build, immaculate pedigree, and unparalleled ability to latch onto opponents’ throats until they bleed to death, sources confirmed today that purebred American pit bull terrier Nitro is widely expected to secure top...

Huskies Unstoppable During Cold-Weather Puppy Bowl

NEW YORK—Overcoming frigid temperatures and biting winds, a team of husky puppies overpowered and trounced the opposition Sunday during Puppy Bowl X, the first ever cold-weather Puppy Bowl. As temperatures dropped into the low twenties, puppies atte...
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Family Chooses Different Dog Than Reincarnated Grandfather

ORLANDO, FL—Saying they instantly fell in love with the good-natured golden retriever, members of the Judd family reportedly chose Thursday to adopt a different dog from an animal shelter than their reincarnated grandfather. “Right when we walked into the shelter, this little terrier jumped up on us and barked and started licking the kids, but we really had our hearts set on a golden named Buddy,” said father Marcus Judd, who decided against adopting the “too high-strung” Scottish terrier that bears the reborn soul of his father, Bernard Judd, who passed away two years ago. “That terrier was cute and really seemed to like us. But my youngest daughter was a little scared of him, so we went with Buddy. He’s just the perfect fit for our family.” At press time, the family had reportedly administered medicine to their new pet, quickly killing their grandmother who had been reincarnated as a roundworm.

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