Prescription Label Recommends Just Taking More And More Until Something Kicks In

In This Section

medication

Expensive Medical Treatments

Many Americans with life-threatening diseases have been refusing new medical treatments, saying the high costs outweigh the benefits. Here are a...

COX-2 Inhibitors

The FDA is currently deciding whether to restrict the use of COX-2 inhibitors, the widely used class of pain drugs which includes Vioxx. What do you think?

Jay-Z's Grandfather Busted With Trunk Full Of Canadian Prescription Drugs

BUFFALO, NY—Tyrone J. Carter, rap artist Jay-Z's 75-year-old grandfather, was arrested Monday for transporting prescription drugs across the Canadian border in the trunk of his 1998 Oldsmobile. "My grandson says I shouldn't have unlocked the trunk unless the cops had a warrant, but what's a man supposed to do?" said Carter, who was busted with more than $1,000 worth of pharmaceutical-grade Diovan, Lipitor, and Lanoxin. "Don't the police have anything better to do than hassle a sick old man? My insurance doesn't cover my pills anymore—I gotta get my heart medicine somewhere." The arresting officers said the pills had a U.S.-pharmacy value of nearly $18,000.
End Of Section
  • More News
TV Listings
Just Like Everything Else!: Fox 8 p.m. EDT/7 p.m. ABC Pete's wife is still on him about building that darn shed, these kids are going to be the death of Sheila and Dave, and the hot next-door neighbor is up in EVERYBODY'S business! Sunday nights on ABC couldn't be any more familiar!

Special Coverage

Business

Fantasy Sports

FIFA Frantically Announces 2015 Summer World Cup In United States

ZURICH—After the Justice Department indicted numerous executives from world soccer’s governing body on charges of corruption and bribery, frantic and visibly nervous officials from FIFA held an impromptu press conference Wednesday to announce that the United States has been selected to host this summer’s 2015 World Cup.

Prescription Label Recommends Just Taking More And More Until Something Kicks In

GREENVILLE, SC—Providing the drug’s dosage information and instructions for use, the label for anti-anxiety medication Ativan reportedly recommends that patients just keep taking more and more of the pharmaceutical until something kicks in, sources confirmed Wednesday. “Take two tablets by mouth and then just keep on throwing them back until you can really feel something,” reads the label adhered to the pill bottle, which further suggests that users might as well dump out as many 2 mg caplets as can fit into their palm and “pop ’em all in there” if nothing really hits them after the first dose. “Repeat every four hours, two hours, or however often you think you need a pick-me-up. Contact your doctor immediately if you go through the entire bottle and still don’t feel any different.” For faster-acting results, an additional sticker on the bottle reportedly urges patients to combine the medication with as many other prescription drugs as they can find.


Next Story

Onion Video

Watch More