‘Star Wars’ Turns 40

When George Lucas’ Star Wars premiered in 1977, the movie quickly became a phenomenon. On its 40th anniversary, The Onion looks back on the franchise’s defining moments:

What You Need To Know About Last Night’s Oscars Debacle

Many viewers were left wondering about the sequence of events that led to the initial erroneous declaration of ‘La La Land’ as the Best Picture winner at the Academy Awards Sunday instead of the real winner, ‘Moonlight’. The Onion breaks down what you need to know about this fiasco.

Brad Pitt Sidelined 6 To 8 Weeks With Red Carpet Toe

LOS ANGELES—Saying doctors strongly recommended that he stay off the injured foot, representatives for Brad Pitt confirmed to reporters Sunday that the actor was sidelined six to eight weeks with a case of red carpet toe.

The Onion’s 2017 Oscar Picks

The 89th Academy Awards features a more diverse slate of film and actor nominees than in past years, though the ceremony could still field #OscarsSoWhite criticism. Here are The Onion’s picks for who should take home the coveted Oscar statuettes:
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What To Watch For In The New Obi-Wan Kenobi Film

Disney has announced they are in the early stages of developing a stand-alone Star Wars film focused on the adventures of Jedi master Obi-Wan Kenobi. Here’s what fans can expect to see in the upcoming release.

  • Depressing subplot where a once youthful and open-minded Kenobi develops deep-seated prejudices against Jawas and Sand People

  • Finally fills in events taking place between the ‘Kenobi’ Star Wars Expanded Universe novel and 1986 ‘Chewbacca and Friends’ collectible lunchbox

  • Frank Oz not sounding particularly into it

  • Introduction of sleazy realtor character who saddled Obi-Wan with his iconic piece-of-shit hut

  • A special appearance by the original Obi-Wan Kenobi hyphen

  • Obi-Wan Kenobi finally meets Gungan son he conceived while serving tour of duty on Naboo during Trade Federation War

  • Awkward conversation where pupil Luke Skywalker returns to ask for recommendation letter

  • Lightsabers, blasters, and spaceships scrapped in favor of raw, bare-knuckle combat

  • A fleeting but unshakable feeling that this is no longer special

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