adBlockCheck

pets

Departing Bo Obama Lands K Street Lobbyist Position

WASHINGTON—Touting his lengthy tenure in the White House and close personal relationships with the president of the United States and first lady, executives at Brownstein Hyatt Farber Schreck announced Monday that once the current administration steps down later this week, the departing Bo Obama will officially join their high-powered K Street lobbying firm.

Popular Designer Dog Breed Just Twisted Spinal Cord Attached To Collapsed Lung

NEW YORK—Growing quickly in popularity following its official recognition by the American Kennel Club last year, the Toy Whiffle—a floppy-eared collapsed lung loosely attached to a severely twisted spinal column—is now one of the most sought-after designer dog breeds in the country, according to an AKC survey published Thursday.

Tips For Training Your Dog

Bringing a dog into the family can be as difficult as it is rewarding, and pet owners must set rules and boundaries for the newest members of their household. Here are The Onion’s tips for training your dog

Pet Adoption Tips

Animal shelters across the country are filled with dogs, cats, and other animals that need homes, though bringing a pet into your family can be both a rewarding and challenging experience.

Dog Doesn’t Consider Itself Part Of Family

THOMASVILLE, GA—While admitting that he relies on members of the family for food and shelter and is often included in household activities and family photographs, local 6-year-old golden retriever Pepper told reporters Friday that he in no way consi...
End Of Section
  • More News

10-Month-Old Pug Worried Upon Reaching Age When Father Developed Debilitating Breathing Problems

BEAVER, PA—Frequently taking deep breaths to test his lung capacity, a local 10-month-old pug was reportedly worried Thursday upon reaching the age where his father developed debilitating respiratory problems. “You can’t help but be concerned when you realize you’re the exact same age your dad was when he started wheezing all the time,” said the pug, explaining how his fears were made all the more unsettling by memories of his father being able to climb no more than three steps before needing to lie down for 15 minutes just to catch his breath. “I didn’t worry when these problems seemed so far away, but now the day when I can’t walk from the kitchen to the living room without an attack of snorting is right around the corner. It’s like you start closing in on 1 year old, and everything just falls apart.” At press time, the pug had been spared his father’s breathing issues and instead was nearly immobile from hip dysplasia.

More from this section

Popular Designer Dog Breed Just Twisted Spinal Cord Attached To Collapsed Lung

NEW YORK—Growing quickly in popularity following its official recognition by the American Kennel Club last year, the Toy Whiffle—a floppy-eared collapsed lung loosely attached to a severely twisted spinal column—is now one of the most sought-after designer dog breeds in the country, according to an AKC survey published Thursday.

Tips For Training Your Dog

Bringing a dog into the family can be as difficult as it is rewarding, and pet owners must set rules and boundaries for the newest members of their household. Here are The Onion’s tips for training your dog

Sign up For The Onion's Newsletter

Give your spam filter something to do.

Close