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Olay Introduces New Line Of Pre-Moisturized Skin

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NicoDerm Introduces New Nicotine Eye Patch

PHILADELPHIA—Praising the product as an effective and convenient means of helping individuals quit smoking, pharmaceutical manufacturer GlaxoSmithKline announced Wednesday the release of its new NicoDerm eye patch.

Q-Tips Introduces New Multi-Speed Electric Ear Swab

ENGLEWOOD CLIFFS, NJ—Saying the product will allow for more efficient and thorough cleaning, representatives from the Unilever corporation announced Tuesday the addition of a multi-function electric ear swab to its longstanding Q-tips line.

New Pre-Sauced Napkins Can Be Thrown Away Straight From Package

CINCINNATI—Describing it as a major time-saver over traditional napkins, Procter & Gamble announced Thursday the release of its new Bounty pre-sauced napkins, which have been expressly designed to be removed from the package and immediately thrown into the trash.

Listerine Introduces New Mouth Styling Gel

NEW BRUNSWICK, NJ—Announcing that consumers no longer need to settle for plain, drab dental features, Johnson & Johnson unveiled its new line of Listerine mouth styling gels Wednesday.

Car Buying Tips

Buying a car is a huge financial investment, and it’s important to make sure you’ve taken the right steps to finding the most affordable and convenient vehicle for you. Here are some tips for picking out and purchasing a car:
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Ugh, This A Place Where Bartenders Wear Bow Tie

PITTSBURGH—Saying they should have known from the moment they walked in the unmarked speakeasy entrance and spotted the extensive wood paneling, customers confirmed Friday that, ugh, this is one of those places where the bartenders all wear bow ties.

Olay Introduces New Line Of Pre-Moisturized Skin

CINCINNATI―Calling it a quick and simple way to achieve a “radiant, youthful glow,” health and beauty giant Olay announced the launch of its new line of pre-moisturized skin Wednesday. “Olay Hydrating Effects Epidermal Layer Plus is guaranteed to give women the luscious, dazzling skin they’ve always wanted,” Olay marketing director Devin Salazar said in a press release, adding that consumers who purchase the 6-ounce jar of human skin can use it to touch up “trouble areas,” immediately reversing the effects of drying, aging, or discoloration. “Just tear off as much or as little skin as you need, apply it where desired, and enjoy the confidence that comes from knowing you can have a fresh, young face at any age.” Salazar went on to state that the new product contains no additives or synthetic chemicals, as it is procured entirely from all-natural sources.

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