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Sports

Most Valuable Sports Memorabilia

Sports collectibles have skyrocketed in popularity over the past several decades, with sales of such items as game-worn jerseys and autographed rookie cards generating billions of dollars each year. Onion Sports examines the most sought-after and highly valued sports memorabilia in the world.

Sixth Super Bowl Win Continues To Elude Patriots

HOUSTON—As disappointed players and coaches returned to the locker room following the end of Super Bowl LI, members of the New England Patriots acknowledged to reporters Sunday that the team’s sixth Super Bowl title continues to elude them.

Greatest Super Bowl Halftime Shows

The Super Bowl halftime show is a long tradition as occasionally exciting as the game itself. The Onion takes a look back at the all-time greatest Super Bowl halftime shows.

NFL Loses Rights To ‘Super Bowl’

NEW YORK—After failing to agree to terms for a new licensing agreement before the February 3 deadline, the NFL lost the rights to the term “Super Bowl” on Friday, sources confirmed.
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Blake Griffin Claims Basketball Seems Much Rounder Lately

LOS ANGELES—Sharing the observation with teammates and coaches, Clippers power forward Blake Griffin reportedly insisted on several occasions Monday that the NBA official game basketball seems much rounder lately. “Now, whenever I touch the ball, it definitely feels way more curvier,” said Griffin, who appeared lost in thought while slowly running his fingers along the basketball’s surface before declaring that the object looked “extra spherical.” “Maybe they started putting in super-strong circles when they make the basketballs, because I swear right now there’s a whole lot more roundness.” At press time, Griffin had reportedly concluded that the basketball was probably pregnant.

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