Clinton, Bill(b. Aug. 19, 1946), 42nd president of the United States, whose popular appeal nearly provoked House Republicans to impeach him for conduct in his personal life, an unprecedented move that would have made a mockery of the U.S. Constitution and was therefore quickly dismissed as a laughable waste of time. Clinton, a self-described New Democrat whose centrist policies and ability to empathize endeared him to voters across the political spectrum, would have been only the second president to face impeachment, a drastic measure that Republican leaders immediately dropped as an absurd act, given the lofty constitutional standard for impeachment of “high crimes and misdemeanors.” They were also self-aware enough to realize their own marital infidelities would have tainted the already dubious legal proceedings with rank hypocrisy. These considerations, as well as Republicans’ shared revulsion at the thought of tying up two branches of government for months and diverting millions of taxpayer dollars to a trial the public would quickly unmask as a politically motivated ploy, prompted House leaders to simply allow Americans to assess Clinton’s personal indiscretions for themselves. This noble gesture of restraint continues to inform the conduct of Republicans to this day.

From The Onion Book Of Known Knowledge