Taxation, system by which slimy IRS stooges reach right into your wallet with their grubby little fingers and rob you blind for the purpose of maintaining a safe, functioning society. The government sons of bitches, who are always looking for new ways to take what rightfully belongs to you, steal your hard-earned money in broad daylight just so they can provide you and other members of society with health care and maintain streets for you to drive on. On occasion, the filthy snakes promise to lower the rate of taxation, but unfortunately, we live in a world where greedy bureaucratic bandits are allowed to take the shirt clean off your fucking back to protect the country from foreign enemies and keep your kid’s school open.
Articles under "Taxation"
Marxists' Apartment A Microcosm Of Why Marxism Doesn't Work
AMHERST, MA—A filthy, disorganized apartment shared by three Marxists clearly shows why the utopia described by Marx will never come to fruition.
The Onion Once Again Condemns Actor Eric Bana For His Continued Silence On The Issue Of Gay Marriage
This week, the United States Supreme Court heard arguments in a pair of cases whose outcomes will have a profound impact on homosexual rights in ...
Poll: Many Americans Still Unsure Whom To Vote Against
WASHINGTON, DCAccording to Gallup Poll results released Monday, 6 percent of Americans are still undecided about whether to vote against President Bush or Democratic ...
University Purchased by Menacing Baron
ITHACA, NY (AP)—This is a translation of just one of the verses which will replace Cornell University’s current fight song when Baron Kurt ...
Perky 'Canada' Has Own Government, Laws
It’s Monday morning, and Toronto resident Steve Dorman shares a quick breakfast of “eggs” (a native food) with his “wife” (an officially state-sanctioned mate ...
Ask A Third Party Candidate
Edgar Mayo Jr. is a syndicated columnist whose weekly advice column, Ask A Third Party Candidate, appears in more than 250 newspapers nationwide.
U.S. Anachronism At 'All Time High,' Says Truman
INDEPENDENCE, MO—At a press conference Monday, former president Harry S Truman declared that U.S. anachronism levels are at "an all-time high." Responding to ...
Mister Rogers' Neighborhood Gerrymandered To Serve King Friday's Make-Believe Agenda
MISTER ROGERS' NEIGHBORHOOD, PA—A plan to radically redistrict Mr. Rogers' Neighborhood to further cement the control of the powerful King...
Geopolitical Balance Of Power Somehow Unaffected By Death Of Princess
LONDON—In a development that has baffled experts, the geopolitical balance of power has been strangely unaffected by the death of Princess Diana, considered by ...
Tea Party Movement Hopelessly Divided Into Enraged, Apoplectic Factions
WASHINGTON—Organizers of the Tea Party movement, a group opposed to the federal government’s attempts to alleviate the ongoing financial...
Taxing Virtual Assets
A panel of scholars and government officials recently said that taxation of assets from online games such as World of Warcraft is inevitable. What do...










