Department Of Interior Bilked Out Of $18 Million In Funding By Con Gopher

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Vol 49 Issue 05

Onion Sports' Live Coverage Of Super Bowl XLVII

Highlights Pregame Nation Excited For Opportunity To Watch Harbaugh Lose Super Bowl Pregame Onion Sports' Guide To Super Bowl XLVII Pregame Coverage Nation Excited For Opportunity To Watch Harbaugh Lose Super Bowl “I’m so pumped up! I can...

Hometown Wistfully Toured Via Google Street View

COLUMBUS, OH—Eleven years after last walking through his hometown, 29-year-old local man Paul Brundage reportedly spent the entire evening Friday revisiting his childhood neighborhood in Decatur, IL using the Google Maps Street View feature.
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Man Commits To New TV Show Just Hours After Getting Out Of 7-Season Series

UNION CITY, NJ—Recommending that he give himself the chance to pause and explore the other options out there, friends of local man Jonathan Gember expressed their concerns to reporters Wednesday that the 29-year-old is already committing to a new television show just hours after getting out of a seven-season-long series.

Healthy Living

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    Every new year brings a surge in gym membership from new members nicknamed “resolutionists,” many of whom may be unaware that there are unspoken rules everyone must observe when working out.

Department Of Interior Bilked Out Of $18 Million In Funding By Con Gopher

Officials from the Interior Department hastily assembled a press conference Thursday after the government agency was reportedly swindled out of an estimated $18 million by a smooth-talking con gopher.

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