Maybelline Introduces New Ideal-Woman Rubber Mask To Use In Place Of Makeup

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Vol 50 Issue 30

Sex Toy Discreetly Shipped In Plain Dildo-Shaped Box

Medical experts announce that an Ebola vaccine is at least 50 white people away from being developed, a new poll finds a majority of the CIA is now ready to install a female world leader, and a sex toy is discreetly shipped in a plain dildo-shaped box.

Teens Getting Hurt Playing ‘Fire Challenge’ Game

Police and medical workers across the country are reporting more incidents of teenagers hurting themselves playing the “Fire Challenge” game shown in numerous YouTube videos, which involves pouring a small amount of flammable liquid on their b...
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Just Like Everything Else!: Fox 8 p.m. EDT/7 p.m. ABC Pete's wife is still on him about building that darn shed, these kids are going to be the death of Sheila and Dave, and the hot next-door neighbor is up in EVERYBODY'S business! Sunday nights on ABC couldn't be any more familiar!

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Productivity

Scientists Posit Theoretical ‘Productive Weekend’

CAMBRIDGE, MA—Challenging long-accepted scientific convention, a group of leading MIT scientists published a report Thursday positing that, under certain rare and specific conditions, a so-called “productive weekend” is theoretically pos...

Family

Report: Dad Wants To Show You Where Fuse Box Is

YOUR LOCATION—Noting that it’s important to be prepared in case of emergencies but it’s also a good thing to know in general, your dad announced today that he wants to show you where the fuse box is.

Maybelline Introduces New Ideal-Woman Rubber Mask To Use In Place Of Makeup

Touting it as their most stylish and advanced beauty product to date, officials from global cosmetics brand Maybelline unveiled Thursday the Ideal-Woman Rubber Mask, a flexible facial covering that can be worn over the head in lieu of makeup.

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