The Seattle Seahawks are a football team, Kenny. They have a stadium. -They blew that team up years ago Doc, I saw it happen. And you've already lost round one of The Face Off. The NBA lockout is over but fans are outraged at players and owners for failing to reach an agreement to beat each other with chains. This whole lockout started really wanted to beat each other with chains, but couldn't agree on whether to use serrated chainsaw chains or rusty logging chains. We're going to have to wait another ten seasons before we see an owner or player get whipped in the face with so much as a car antenna. No appreciation for the fans here. Millionaires and billionaires can't solve their problems and all we're left with is basketball. College kids already play that for free. Quit crying about the fans, Doc. If you don't like that these greedy cowards aren't covered in link-shaped contusions, stop handing them your money and start cudgeling them yourself. You're just sticking up for the wealthy owners because your buddy Michael Jordan uses a heavy gold chain to beat you. I should beat you with snow tire chains for allowing yourself to be beaten. -Everybody should be beaten with everything, except Tim Tebow. But the Denver Broncos, they're 5-1 with Tebow as a starter and it is inspiring other NFL teams to start shitty quarterbacks. -Lots of teams are hoping they can find a player as God-awful as Tebow. The Chiefs just signed Kyle Orton who is so bad, he was cut in favor of Tebow, but there's no indication he's bad enough to win. You're bad enough to win, Doc, and being on this show is winning. -I don't know what that means but I know I hate you for saying it. You have to credit Tebow's upbeat and infuriating attitude. He always stays positive no matter how shitty he is. You're an idiot, Doc. What about Mark Sanchez? The Jets have been riding his terrible arm for years. Sanchez is so bad he lost to Tebow. But the Jets need a quarterback so bad he'll beat Tebow. Okay, hot stove time, don't put your hand on the hot stove. Then stop putting it next to my desk. This is why we can't have hot things, Doc. Astros making waves in the free agent market, saying they're interested in signing up to nine professional baseball players. Baseball players are expensive. Houston is not going to have the money to sign nine whole guys. -They don't need nine. Just get six, spread them out and stick a dog in center field. Kenny, you jackass, wait until they trade their line to sign a dog. There's lots of humans on the market who have played baseball before. -Get your fat head out of your vacuous head, Doc. The Astros can't keep waiting for some perfect assortment of players who all play different positions. -When they move to the AL in 2013, they're actually going to need ten players. Now you're just making things up. I'd tell you that you need to watch more baseball, but I really want you to get better. Alright, that does it for The Face Off. Get back into my face when we return so we can pat ourselves on the back by announcing we're totally against child molestation. I'm really proud of how against child molestation I am. Oh, compared to me you're practically for it.