ONN Newsroom

New Auto Security System Will Not Allow Car To Start If Driver Is Nick Nolte

The Department Of Transportation unveiled a new mandatory safety system designed to protect American drivers by keeping Nick Nolte off the road.

  • ONN Newsroom
  • 199 Episodes
  • The Onion News Network’s flagship news program, Newsroom, brings you news without mercy 24/7, penetrating deeper into the stories that matter than any human has previously believed possible.

Sign up For The Onion's Newsletter

Give your spam filter something to do.