Romney To Undergo Gender Reassignment Surgery To Better Connect With Women Voters

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Vol 48 Issue 22

Ellen Cooper

Account manager Ellen Cooper only sighed audibly four times during last Tuesday's staff meeting.

Deadliest Catch: Fish Perspective

Discovery 9:00 p.m. EST/8:00 p.m. CST Tonight, teams of fish equipped with special underwater cameras attempt to avoid the fishermen’s nets, but then they just swim away with all the cameras and footage.

Sad Sack Bullied By Area Goose

ARLINGTON, MA—According to onlookers in Wright Park, local sad sack Morgan Jennings was intimidated, bullied, and sent fleeing for safety by a Canada goose today while walking beside the park's namesake pond. Sources said the 36-year-old benefits of...

Dinner For One

Food 10:00 p.m. EST/9:00 p.m. CST Four days after Kaitlin's decision to call off the engagement, host Adam Viscardi gazes vacantly into the camera while absentmindedly eating half a box of pancake mix.
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Just Like Everything Else!: Fox 8 p.m. EDT/7 p.m. ABC Pete's wife is still on him about building that darn shed, these kids are going to be the death of Sheila and Dave, and the hot next-door neighbor is up in EVERYBODY'S business! Sunday nights on ABC couldn't be any more familiar!

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Healthy Living

  • The Onion’s Guide To Gym Etiquette

    Every new year brings a surge in gym membership from new members nicknamed “resolutionists,” many of whom may be unaware that there are unspoken rules everyone must observe when working out.

Romney To Undergo Gender Reassignment Surgery To Better Connect With Women Voters

Joe Biden plans to honor fallen U.S. soldiers by jumping his motorcycle over the Vietnam Memorial, Thomas the Tank Engine is a little uneasy with his broad autistic following, and a friend who said goodbye 10 minutes ago is still on Gchat. It's the week of May 21st, 2012.

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