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Could You Process A Claim At A Health Insurance Company?

Jimmy Carter Embarks On Quest To Eat At Every Taco Bell In America

CEO Outlines Challenges Company Facing Due To Own Insatiable Greed

RALEIGH, NC—Holding an all-hands meeting Tuesday morning to discuss first-quarter performance and set expectations for the rest of the year, local CEO Randall Schmidt reportedly outlined the challenges the company was facing due to his own…

Breaking News

Another Star Falls From American Flag Following Well-Attended Drag Queen Brunch

AMERICA, FORMER LAND OF THE FREE AND EX-HOME OF THE BRAVE—A hush reportedly spread across the country Tuesday as another star fell from the American flag following a well-attended drag queen brunch. “So for our special today, we have a salmon…

Breaking News

Spirit Airlines Begins Offering $45 Directions To Nearest Greyhound Bus Station

MIRAMAR, FL—Adding another option to its budget-friendly travel offerings, Spirit Airlines began providing a new service this week that allows passengers to purchase directions to the nearest bus station for $45. “In keeping with the ultra-low…

Politics

Conservatives Reveal Why They’re So Triggered By Pride Merchandise

Local

Man Never Knows Right Time In Job Interview To Go In For Kiss

Entertainment

‘Succession’ Ends With Roy Family Saving Christmas

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104-Year-Old Man Awarded WWII Medal Just To Be Nice

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Man At Beach Worried Wife Hasn’t Surfaced For Air Because She Cheating On Him

PORT ARANSAS, TX—Suspecting the worst, local man Daniel Koleva reportedly spent several panicked moments during his beach trip Friday worried that his wife, Bethany Koleva, hadn’t surfaced for air yet because she was cheating on him. “There’s no…

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Family Has Rule Where They Don’t Eat Cell Phones At Dinner

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Politics

Matt Gaetz Takes Out Half-Page Ad In House Bill Congratulating Teen Girl On High School Graduation

WASHINGTON—Shelling out $55 for the loving tribute, Rep. Matt Gaetz (R-FL) reportedly took out a half-page ad in a House bill Friday to congratulate a local teen girl on her high school graduation. “Congrats, Kayla, so proud of you, punkin!” read…