BURLINGTON, VTâExpressing their utter disgust and disappointment over the candidateâs remarks, supporters of presidential contender Bernie Sanders went on the attack Thursday, laying into the Vermont senator for his criticism of mistakes made by the 2016 Bernie Sanders campaign. âThese deeply misguided comments makeâŚ
ATLANTAâSaying that theyâd seen a significant spike in reported cases, the United States Centers for Disease Control and Prevention released a statement Thursday warning that the once-eradicated jitterbug has started to spread across the country at a rate not seen since the 1940s. âWe thought we had completely wipedâŚ
Since we opened our first location in Sauk City, WI in 1984, Culverâs has become a beloved institution across the Midwest. Folks love to stop in for a hearty, cooked-to-order meal with family or friends, and our restaurants are pillars of the communities they serve. While it seems unlikely that any serious candidateâŚ
The U.S. Food and Drug Administration approved a device that delivers mild shocks to the brains of children between 7 and 12 years old in order to treat their ADHD. What do you think?Â
In the wake of the Mueller reportâs release, 2020 candidates including Pete Buttigieg, Kamala Harris, and Elizabeth Warren have urged Congress to pursue impeachment proceedings against the president. What do you think?
FLINT, MIâWarning that he ran the only drug game in town as he firmly tugged back on the offenderâs hair, Acreage Holdings executive John Boehner beheaded a Juarez Cartel gang member Wednesday in order to thwart an attempt to muscle in on the legal weed game. âSay adios, pendejo!â said the blood-splattered formerâŚ
AMES, IAâAttempting to redirect the conversation to a more neutral topic that would prevent anyone from getting too worked up, a diplomatic Pete Buttigieg quickly changed the subject Wednesday when politics came up at a town hall event. âHey, I get asked about political stuff all the timeâletâs find something else toâŚ
SAN DIEGOâMortified at his lack of familiarity with the seemingly mundane utensil, local diner Thad Jenkins succumbed to paralyzing self-consciousness Wednesday upon realizing that he was the only patron of Japanese restaurant Azuki Sushi who was unclear on the proper use of his water glass. âI kept sneaking littleâŚ
SANTA BARBARA, CAâSaying the world must act quickly to save the chewy organisms before it was too late, environmentalists warned Tuesday that the worldâs Swedish Fish population has been decimated by the Great Pacific Sour Patch. âFor years, humanity has increased its sour candy production, dumping unnatural levels ofâŚ
Reports that President Trump was considering a plan to release detained undocumented immigrants in the nationâs sanctuary cities has put the spotlight back on a controversial immigration policy. The Onion takes a look at the pros and cons of sanctuary cities.
DENVERâConfessing that the rich sound of the stabbing victimâs Yorkshire-bred voice made her âgo positively weak,â Genevieve Clare, 31, confirmed Wednesday that she could listen to the dying British man in the street scream for help all day long. âI couldnât begin to tell you what it is about that accent, but my heartâŚ
Amid a resumed interest in several past scandals, former Godfatherâs Pizza CEO Herman Cain has withdrawn from consideration for a seat on the Federal Reserve Board. What do you think?
SPARTA, OHâExpressing disgust and shock while describing the disturbing scene, local authorities were reportedly horrified Wednesday after discovering a one-day-old funnel cake abandoned in a dumpster. âWe are still searching for the individual responsible for this horrendous act,â said police chief Gregory Lee,âŚ
President Trump sued Rep. Elijah Cummings (D-MD) to stop subpoenas for the presidentâs tax returns, saying the House Oversight and Reform chairman has overstepped constitutional limits on Congressâs power to investigate. What do you think?
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