Pope Francis has garnered much international attention in the first two and a half years of his papacy, taking a more liberal approach to women’s issues, the family unit, and the environment than his predecessors. Here is a primer on prominent global issues and the pope’s views on them:
- Contraception: Goes against God’s plan for global population crisis
- Climate Change: Opposes just as strongly as most other forms of change
- Women Priests: Nope
- Child Abuse: Must be eradicated entirely from church’s list of PR issues
- Divorce: Tacit acknowledgment that perhaps not all differences are completely and beautifully reconciled by reciting the Nicene Creed
- God: Generally in favor of
- Wealth Inequality: Prays with only the least jewel-encrusted rosaries when visiting the poor
- Birds: Fucking loves birds
- Child Labor: Very helpful during mass
- Homosexuality: Famously quipped, “Who am I to judge?” when asked about his views, before adding, “Oh, right, the pope”