Amazon Offers New Blank Box Upcharge For Progressive Members To Discreetly Receive Prime Orders

Illustration for article titled Amazon Offers New Blank Box Upcharge For Progressive Members To Discreetly Receive Prime Orders

SEATTLE—In an effort to help socially conscious subscribers avoid the judgment of their peers, Amazon reportedly began offering a new blank box upcharge Tuesday for progressive members to discreetly receive their Prime orders. “For just $3 per shipment, Amazon users who are outwardly critical of our company can have their packages delivered in a blank cardboard box without any logos or branding so they’ll never get called out for being hypocritical,” read the company’s press release, which explained how the packages would be delivered by a plainclothes employee in a nondescript white van so as to avoid drawing any suspicion. “Our new concealment services are perfect for any activist type who publicly condemns our unethical business practices yet sometimes needs to order some disposable razors on a two-day turnaround. We have already begun rolling out the service in liberal hubs such as Portland, Berkeley, and New York, and will be expanding to other cities in the coming months.” The press release also explained that for an extra $2, each package could be branded with the logo of a struggling, non-profit bookstore that helps disenfranchised communities or a local farming co-op.

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