HARTFORD, CT—Wishing he could return to browsing golf instructional videos in peace, local resident Brian O’Connell reportedly expressed irritation Thursday that an annoying YouTube algorithm was not letting him forget the single time he watched 14 straight hours of Hitler speeches. “It’s so aggravating, I mean, all I did was watch one full day of Hitler speeches—it’s kind of creepy that they even track that sort of thing,” said O’Connell, adding that it was impossible for him to focus on baseball highlights while his “Autoplay” column was filled with videos claiming to expose the insidious Jewish conspiracies undermining the establishment of a white ethnostate. “What’s even more frustrating is that it keeps trying to push more Hitler speeches on me. I search for Scarlett Johansson. I get Hitler speeches. The Aladdin trailer finishes. It starts playing another Hitler speech. I mean, hello guys, I’ve already seen all those speeches anyway. I’m certainly not interested in African dictators either. Man, you click on Hitler’s 1939 ‘Jewish Question’ speech to the Reichstag 48 times and all of a sudden it thinks that’s all you want to see. What can I say, I went straight down a rabbit hole.” At press time, O’Connell vowed to use incognito mode if he desired to watch 14 hours of Hitler speeches again.
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