SAN QUENTIN, CA—Following the announcement that Joe Biden won the U.S. Presidential Election, the Aryan Brotherhood reported a record surge in donations this week. “Over the past few days, we have seen a record increase in donors who want to help us during this time of unprecedented assaults on the master race,” said Drew Mackey, one of the leaders of the white supremacist prison gang, adding that the new inflow of cash will allow the organization to open up multiple new chapters, hire additional staff, and further disseminate their message of racial purity. “Although this comes as a disappointment for us all, we are heartened by the historic amount of new patrons to our cause of fighting the war against the Blacks and the Jews. This will allow us to do important work when it comes to promoting racially fueled domestic terrorism and retaking the White House.” At press time, Stormfront, the Traditionalist Workers Party, and the Ku Klux Klan had all reported similar windfalls of cash.