Attention-Seeking Willis McGahee Almost Ruins Steelers' Good Time

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PITTSBURGH, PA—The Pittsburgh Steelers' AFC Championship celebration was nearly ruined Sunday when Baltimore Ravens running back and attention hog Willis McGahee refused to move his extremities following a fourth quarter tackle by safety Ryan Clark, making himself appear to be paralyzed or even dead. "Man, Willis was fine. Turns out he wasn't really hurt that entire time he was laid out on the ground," Pittsburgh's Troy Polamalu said in a postgame press conference in which he vowed never to forgive McGahee for dampening the Steelers' victory. "And oh, yeah, that stretcher was a nice touch. It's like he planned how he could make himself the center of attention." Pittsburgh emergency-room doctors told reporters that they also believed McGahee was faking his severe neck pain and had given him aspirin instead of prescribing any major painkillers.