The U.S. Senate approved a bill Tuesday that would make daylight-saving time permanent starting in 2023. The Onion looks at the benefits of this legislation.
- Extra hour of sunlight you still won’t utilize
- Reduces waste by eliminating need to throw out clock twice a year
- Will curry favor with the sun god Ra
- One step closer to canceling winter altogether
- Won’t throw back out resetting sundial anymore
- Sure to irritate farmer or two
- Dog will finally know what time it is
- Darker winter mornings will make it easier to sleep while driving to work
- Easier than trying to deal with that whole voting rights thing
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