Biggest Mistakes All Gun Owners Make

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When bullets, gun powder, and idiots mix, sometimes the results can be disastrous. Here are the biggest mistakes all gun owners make.

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Living In Any Country Other Than The United States

Oh, man, you are going to have to deal with, like, so many annoying rules.

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Cleaning Gun In Washing Machine

Seems like a time-saver, but can actually damage the gun and appliance, especially if the gun is loaded.

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Blowing Own Fucking Head Off

From this point forward, most gun owners realize a gun is not a toy.

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Forgetting Your Silencer At Home During A Covert Operation

Yikes, looks like you’ll just have to strangle your targets with a fiber wire.

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Failing To Pay NRA Dues

Our right to bear arms is only as strong as the people who fund its gross misinterpretation.

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Loading After Firing

The proper sequence can be tricky at first, but most gun owners eventually figure it out.

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Reaching For Your Gun To Show A Police Officer You Guys Are Matching

Most cops will interpret this as a threat, sadly.

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Forgetting To Change The Batteries

Without their specific, oddly shaped batteries, guns won’t be able to shoot at all.

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Not Keeping Your Gun Clean

If you don’t properly and thoroughly wipe the fingerprints off your weapon after every hit, it will inevitably be traced back to you.

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Forgetting To Climb Into The Gun Safe To Keep All Your Guns Company

It’s cold and dark in there, so the least you could do is stay with your weapons and comfort them.

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Keeping A Loaded Gun Under Your Pillow

A tired gun owner is an ineffective gun owner. Don’t choose preparedness over a comfortable sleep.

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Storing Bullets In The Fridge

Bullets are best kept on the counter at room temperature if they’re going to be used in the next day or so.

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Keeping Your Safe Locked

You don’t want to remember some difficult combination in an emergency when you’re trying to render justice.

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Not Handcuffing Your Gun To Your Wrist

Without taking this precaution, you’re just one giant horseshoe magnet away from being unarmed.

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Overpaying

Guns are basically free if you know where to get them.

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Failing To Properly Socialize Your Gun

If your gun isn’t used to being around people, it could become aggressive and shoot someone to protect you.

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Not Reading Someone Their Miranda Rights

Tell them they have the right to remain silent before discharging your weapon and subsequently covering it up.

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Overfeeding

Treating your gun to a few too many bullets seems harmless, but it can actually lead to sickness, or even death, for your beloved weapon.

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Attempting To Assassinate JFK

It worked once, so now everyone thinks they can do it.

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Having 16 Guns Instead Of 17 Guns

You don’t want to leave yourself totally vulnerable if you simultaneously lose 16 of your guns at the exact moment when an armed intruder breaks into your house.

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Having Kids

No need to protect your guns from your kids if you never have kids to begin with.

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Forgetting To Write A Will

A last will and testament will bring you some peace of mind when you inevitably forget to leave the safety on and shoot yourself in the crotch.