BATON ROUGE, LA—Saying he wasn’t quite president yet but that he was very, very close, Republican candidate Bobby Jindal reportedly lied to his parents Thursday about winning the 2016 GOP nomination. “Now, I don’t officially become president until I win the general election, but I’m just one step away,” said the Louisiana governor on a phone call with his mother and father, cautioning them that while he wasn’t able to live in the White House just yet, he almost certainly would be soon, and they could visit him anytime they wanted. “Yeah, thanks, it’s very exciting. It’s still sinking in…of course you guys can be there when I take the oath of office!” At press time, Jindal’s parents were reportedly telling him how proud they were and that they weren’t the least bit surprised.