Body Positivity Advocate Caught In Illicit Tryst With Conventionally Attractive Lover

Illustration for article titled Body Positivity Advocate Caught In Illicit Tryst With Conventionally Attractive Lover

NEW YORK—In recently released photographs that sent shockwaves through the community, sources confirmed Tuesday that local body positivity advocate Heidi Gustason was caught in an illicit tryst with a conventionally attractive lover. “He has beautiful, dark eyes, a strong jaw, and symmetrical features—how could she,” said Angela Fiennes, a member of the body positivity movement who was “disgusted” by the sight of Gustason—an activist who once staunchly worked to dismantle the concept of beauty standards—gallivanting around with a man whose appearance suggests the use of cosmetics to maintain his luscious, full head of hair and whose toned, 6-foot-tall frame is the epitome of the unrealistic standard for which designers make clothes. “I just can’t believe it—she should be with a short, chubby, bald guy if she really meant everything she said about accepting people for who they are and not what they look like. What a hypocrite.” At press time, sources within the community reported that the criticism had died down after it was rumored the mystery man had a weird mole on his neck.