WASHINGTON‚ÄĒIn a stunning development unfolding rapidly throughout the once-predominantly Caucasian nation, America‚Äôs white population plummeted to 2.7 percent Wednesday following President Trump‚Äôs decision to cave on immigration enforcement. ‚ÄúThe second that Trump showed weakness on immigration, people throughout Central America came flooding across the borders into the country‚ÄĒand there‚Äôs no sign that they‚Äôll stop anytime soon,‚ÄĚ said a representative from the United States Census Bureau, adding that the tens of millions of migrants from Guatemala, Honduras, Mexico, El Salvador, Nicaragua, Belize, and Costa Rica immediately took up residence in every major American city while forcing white families out of their homes, seizing control of the economy at both the local and national levels, and compelling the remaining white citizens to attempt to learn basic Spanish in order to secure entry-level jobs in the service industry. ‚ÄúWithin hours of Trump‚Äôs executive order, every highway sign in the nation had been replaced with one in Spanish. All our data indicate that English will be effectively a dead language in the United States within the next few weeks.‚ÄĚ At press time, el Departamento de Seguridad Nacional anunci√≥ una prohibici√≥n permanente de todos inmigrantes de pa√≠ses cauc√°sicos.

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