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Reporter Investigates Claims He Ruined His Family's Thanksgiving Dinner
Special investigative reporter Gavin Fisher outfits his parents home with hidden cameras to refute claims he ruined the…
Wild Fall Break Parties Pose Risks For College Students
The Onion News Network investigates the dangerous tradition of Fall Break parties where college students chug maple…
Black Part Of Town Moves Across Town
Pennington, IL's only African-American family moves to the other side of town, causing residents to reminisce about…
Back Of Library Smells Like Weed
Library patrons in Pennington, IL report that something definitely smells like weed back in the young adult section.
This Day In History: Apollo 12 Sent To Moon To Pick Up Trash Left By Apollo 11
On This Day In History, the astronauts of Apollo 12 landed on the moon to collect the pizza boxes and beer cans left…
Reporter Steps In To Replace Woman's Missing Husband
When the war in Afghanistan leaves a woman without a husband, caring reporter O'Brady Shaw steps in to replace him.
Thousands Of Americans Trapped In 'Animal Hoarders' Marathon
Tens of thousands of Americans have found themselves tragically unable to tear themselves away from televisions showing…
Prevent Identity Theft By Changing Identity Every Three Years
Shelby Cross warns viewers to protect themselves by becoming a completely different person every few years.
What Is Your Amateur Porn Telling Employers About You?
The First Responders discuss how to keep the amateur porn you make from affecting your job search.
NASA Asks Russians To Stop Filming Porn On International Space Station
In the Daily Briefing, NASA scientists ask the Russians to please stop using the ISS as a personal porn studio and a…
Country Artist Sings About Real America And Its Meth Addicts
On Today Now!, country singer Heath Williams sings about good old boys who smoke meth until their teeth fall out. …
Teens Hold Clothing Drive For Classmate Who Dresses Really Ugly
On Today Now!, Jim and Tracy welcome two Sacramento teens who collected clothing for their classmate so she wouldn't…
Romney's Numbers Skyrocket After Prostitute Reveals She Paid Him To Sleep With Her
Presidential hopeful Mitt Romney's approval rating is way up after a prostitute reveals she paid Romney to sleep with…
Are Wetland Preserves Simply Dead-Body Dumping Grounds?
Shelby Cross continues her crusade against bogs and marshes, which are good for nothing other than hiding bodies.
Breaking Story So New Reporter Literally Has No Information
On "Raw Story," O'Brady Shaw Investigates what may have been a shooting at a local mall, or may have been something…
Reporter Goes Undercover In Chinatown By Wearing Silk Robe
Investigative reporter Gavin Fisher investigates the world of Chinese counterfeit goods by donning a long robe and a…
Failed Musician Comes Crawling Back To Hometown
Residents of Pennington, IL report that hot shit Jeff Statsky has returned home with his tail between his legs.
High Unemployment Rate Linked To One Man With 42,000 Jobs
A recent report finds that one man is selfishly working thousands of jobs while other Americans go without even one.
Search Crews Continue To Look For Obviously Dead Hikers
Autistic reporter Michael Falk questions the logic of continuing to look for a group of lost hikers who clearly are no…
