Californians React To The Homelessness Crisis

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Julia Anthony (Unemployed)

“Why don’t they just move into their parents’ guest house?”

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Mark Johnson (Physician)

“I volunteered at a homeless shelter on Thanksgiving 12 years ago, so I’ve done my part.”

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Jacob Sheets (Data Scientist)

“The term is actually ‘unhoused crisis,’ and I’m completely fine with it happening.”

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Daryl Anders (Hedge Fund Manager)

“I think we need to do more to put homeless people in the ocean.”

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Natasha Clark (Sales Representative)

“Driving by all those sick, hungry, unsheltered people every day breaks my heart, but I usually get over it by watching Ted Lasso when I get home.”

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Barbara Meyer (Fashion Student)

“I’d love to see them in a hat.”

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Eric Garcetti (Mayor)

“Ew, gross!”

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Edgar Flores (Video Editor)

“I do my part by tossing a can of green beans out my high-rise window every once in a while.”

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Jeremy Calvin (Financial Analyst)

“Oh, it’s just horrible. The other day I had to see one of them on the news.”

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Sheila Corvey (Biochemist)

“People dying in the streets is pretty much just part of city living.”

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Curtis Blackwell (Actuary)

“I’m sorry, I don’t carry cash.”

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Lydia Farley (Consultant)

“It fucking rocks. Do you know how easy homeless people are to scapegoat? Imagine what we’d do without them.”

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Francesca Wells (Dermatologist)

“It’s gotten so bad I can’t even drive my car on the sidewalk anymore.”

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McKenna Rucinski (Financial Analyst)

“I thought we solved the homelessness crisis when my family moved from Los Angeles to Santa Clarita.”

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Tyler Hamid (Welder)

“I saw a needle last year, and I still have nightmares sometimes.”

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Pete Quigley (Doctor)

“We must remember that homeless people are people, too—I think? Someone should check.”

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Gerald Barnes (Instagram Influencer)

“I hate how people pretend homelessness is this intractable problem. The easiest way to eliminate homelessness is to have all the people with houses lock themselves in their homes for 24 hours while we spray the rest of San Francisco with napalm.”

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Jamie Foxx (Actor)

“Let’s just say that if the problem gets much bigger, I think I’m going to be forced to win an Oscar for depicting one of them.”

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Phillip Bell (Retired)

“It’s a doggone shame. That’s a new catchphrase I’m trying out—any notes?”

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Lisa Miller (Nurse)

“Our state has a budget surplus, the fifth-largest economy in the world, and the most billionaires in the nation, yet we can’t figure out how to help our most vulnerable citizens win a nightly Powerball drawing.”

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Francis Daughtery (Cook)

“I just try to stay positive and turn a blind eye to systemic issues.”

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Kenneth Murtoch (Real Estate Developer)

“I prefer to reframe the homeless situation not as a crisis, but as an opportunity to abuse homeless people with impunity.”