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Heart Bypass Surgery
Heart Bypass Surgery
U.S.: More money than you got
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Heart Bypass Surgery
Heart Bypass Surgery
Spain: The only cure for an ailing heart is flamenco.
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Removal Of Life’s Savings
Removal Of Life’s Savings
U.S.: Free
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Removal Of Life’s Savings
Removal Of Life’s Savings
E.U.: Procedure rarely performed
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Massive Gunshot Wound
Massive Gunshot Wound
U.S.: $10,000 and up depending on severity
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Massive Gunshot Wound
Massive Gunshot Wound
E.U.: Gunshot wounds? In a civilian hospital?
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Bloodletting
Bloodletting
U.S.: $500 plus cost of individual leeches
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Bloodletting
Bloodletting
E.U.: $0, included in overall bodily humors coverage
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Birth
Birth
U.S.: $13,000 in a hospital
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Birth
Birth
Ireland: 1,500 pounds but if they kill the mom it’s free
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Nurse Having Sex With Your Unconscious Body While In A Coma
Nurse Having Sex With Your Unconscious Body While In A Coma
U.S.: Free
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Nurse Having Sex With Your Unconscious Body While In A Coma
Nurse Having Sex With Your Unconscious Body While In A Coma
E.U.: Free
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Hair Transplant
Hair Transplant
U.S.: Not covered except in cases of emergency baldness
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Hair Transplant
Hair Transplant
E.U.: Free, whatever, we’re not keeping track
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Heart Valve Repair
Heart Valve Repair
U.S.: $20,000 and up, depending on how much hardened nacho cheese needs to be drilled out of ventricles
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Heart Valve Repair
Heart Valve Repair
Finland: Free, plus children’s choir brought in to cheer you on
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Castration
Castration
U.S.: Free if by accidental gunshot
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Castration
Castration
Vatican City: Free if child has voice of angel
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A Good Old-Fashioned Scolding
A Good Old-Fashioned Scolding
U.S.: Free
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A Good Old-Fashioned Scolding
A Good Old-Fashioned Scolding
E.U.: Free
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Ambulance
Ambulance
U.S.: Up to $2,000
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Ambulance
Ambulance
Italy: $35 via gondola
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Knee Replacement
Knee Replacement
U.S.: $30,000
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Knee Replacement
Knee Replacement
E.U.:$5,000, but your knees will be on European calibration
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Urinalysis
Urinalysis
U.S.: Pisspig doctor will do it for $50
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Urinalysis
Urinalysis
E.U.: Pisspig doctor will do it for free
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Treating Traumatic Injuries From Car Crash
Treating Traumatic Injuries From Car Crash
U.S.: A number of factors can affect—oops, you died waiting in the hallway
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Treating Traumatic Injuries From Car Crash
Treating Traumatic Injuries From Car Crash
E.U.: $2,000 and up
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Lice Removal
Lice Removal
U.S.: $550
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Lice Removal
Lice Removal
E.U.: $15
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Lice Installation
Lice Installation
U.S.: $25,000
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Lice Installation
Lice Installation
E.U.: $15
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Prayer Before Surgery
Prayer Before Surgery
U.S.: A doctor in the U.S. may charge up to $5,000 per prayer to God
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Prayer Before Surgery
Prayer Before Surgery
Anywhere Else On Planet: If a doctor did this anywhere else in the world, they would be immediately disbarred
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Appendectomy
Appendectomy
U.S.: $82,000
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Appendectomy
Appendectomy
N/A: Most countries outside the U.S. forego this totally cosmetic procedure
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Treating Injuries From Bear Attack
Treating Injuries From Bear Attack
U.S.: $5,000 medical expenses for cuts, scrapes, gashes plus $8,000 in legal fees for desecrating public property with blood
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Treating Injuries From Bear Attack
Treating Injuries From Bear Attack
Russia: $0 because the victim would not consider going to the doctor
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IUD Placement
IUD Placement
U.S.: $4,000, with 20% discount for certified hotties
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IUD Placement
IUD Placement
Australia: $25 per insertion via boomerang method
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