Congress just returned from recess, and they are faced with a hugely ambitious agenda. Here’s what they will focus on over the next several months.
Pass a replacement of DACA for Trump to sign and campaign against in 2020
Vote on some shit about wetlands that Congressman Keith Rothfus won’t shut up about
Decide what each of them would be if they were all candy bars
Pass a sweeping healthcare law specifically designed to keep John McCain alive long enough to vote for a full repeal of Obamacare
Get bill that says tax somewhere on it to president’s desk
Shatter the debt ceiling
Let loose with some free-form indignant shouting
Come together as a united bipartisan front to name a few post offices after Jerry Lewis
Though they have a packed schedule, lawmakers would still like to strip healthcare from 22 million Americans when they have a free minute