BLOOMINGTON, IN—Determined to remain insulated from all major and minor plot points until this weekend, file clerk Grant Hollis rushed from Midwest Publishing’s employee break room Monday at the first mention of the 2012 comedy film Here Comes The Boom. “Everyone around here has already watched Here Comes The Boom, it’s all they’re talking about, and I really don’t want any part of the movie ruined before I see it,” said Hollis, who bolted from the room with his hands over his ears the moment conversation turned to the Kevin James vehicle. “I wouldn’t even let myself watch the trailer. I just want to sit down and be surprised.” At press time, this reporter hasn’t seen Here Comes The Boom, but it’s pretty safe to say that Kevin James saves the goddamn school at the end.
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