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De Blasio PAC Spends $30 Million On Ads Urging Candidate Not To Embarrass Self By Running

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NEW YORK—Blanketing airwaves, print, radio, and social media with dire warnings of incurring public humiliation, the De Blasio Political Action Committee spent $30 million on advertisements urging the mayor of New York City, Bill de Blasio, to not embarrass himself by running for president, sources confirmed Thursday. “As friends and admirers of Mayor de Blasio, we want to do everything in our power to make sure he doesn’t make a total jackass of himself by running for president,” said PAC president Greg Zimmer, highlighting the mail flyers distributed directly to de Blasio’s house cautioning him not to run because of how it would affect his family, a TV commercial push with 3-minute spots during the mayor’s favorite programs reminding him that there are already 20 other Democratic candidates with better ideas and more support, and a social media video blitz featuring elected officials and donors referencing polling data that shows him at 0%. “We’ve also launched a massive billboard campaign with slogans like “Jesus, Please Don’t Do This,” “Come To Your Senses, Bill,” and “No One Wants This.” Once that’s up, our team of canvassers will knock on his door every 20 minutes to personally beg him not to do this by reminding him that he’s already got a great gig as the mayor of New York City. We hope our message will resonate with him.” At press time, sources confirmed the De Blasio PAC had hired a number of “consultants” to knock some sense into de Blasio.