President Obama unveiled Monday a plan to increase the country’s clean power usage that many are calling the strongest action ever taken by a U.S. president to combat the effects of climate change. Here are some key details of Obama’s climate change plan:
- Immediate removal of smokestacks atop White House
- Designates team of workers to cool down planet’s hottest surfaces with damp towels and washcloths
- Increases wind by 80 million gusts
- Provides state governments with template for lawsuit to file in federal court
- Sets aside a couple ecosystems to decimate every few years to release repressed environmentally destructive energy
- Creates $500 tax credit for homeowners who install rooftop nuclear reactors
- Encourages citizens to choose more environmentally friendly method of suicide than running car in garage
- Serves as major legacy-builder for Obama until presidential system is forgotten in catastrophic, drought-ravaged Black Times beginning in 2047
Advertisement