MENLO PARK, CA—With their CEO claiming he had been able to do it before when no one was looking, Facebook employees reportedly sighed Wednesday as Mark Zuckerberg attempted to break a board with his fist for the 10th time. “He keeps trying to punch through it, and he told us we can’t leave until he shows us how it’s done,” said Facebook engineer Ravi Kumar, wincing as he tried to ignore the pained screams of Zuckerberg, whose fist hit the half-inch pine board limply and to no avail. “He clearly broke his finger on the fourth or fifth attempt, but he won’t stop trying. He insists there must be something wrong with the board. Mark needs to just give up. Sorry, I meant Mark-sensei.” At press time, sources within the company confirmed Zuckerberg had hired someone to break the board for him.