MUSCATINE, IA—Sources within the Brier family admitted to being "a bit alarmed" this morning after Kevin Brier, 34, consumed his special Father's Day gift of bacon with what his wife and two children are describing as disturbing and grotesque swiftness. "Happy father's d—" said Brier's wife, stopping mid sentence and realizing her husband had already far exceeded the recommended serving quantity of two slices. "Honey…honey, slow down." At press time, Brier had put on his other gifts, a new pair of khakis and a polo shirt, and driven to the supermarket to buy more bacon.
We may earn a commission from links on this page.