A new report cataloguing swabs from ATM keypads throughout New York City found that in addition to bacteria from human skin, microbes from fish, mollusks, and baked goods were also widespread. What do you think?

“It’s not hard, people: wash your ATMs.”

Judy Mundt • Denim Distresser


“There’s nothing more annoying than some microbiologist swabbing for gross little organisms while you’re waiting in line behind them.”

Brady Lefkin • Distortion Expert

“Fine! I admit to enjoying a bit of cake while making my withdrawals!”

Craig Witzke • Clam Shucker

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