
TALLAHASSEE, FL—Worried it would hinder their capacity to direct meaningful ridicule and abuse at their schoolmates, bullies across Florida expressed concern Thursday that the state’s proposed “Don’t Say Gay” law would make it tougher to identify LGBTQ students to torment. “After failing to consult with a single elementary school bully, state lawmakers have written a bill that makes it nearly impossible for us to single out and harass all the gay, lesbian, and trans kids,” 11-year-old bully Nathan Blevins said of the bill, which has won the support of Florida Gov. Ron DeSantis (R) and, if passed, would prohibit classroom discussion of sexual orientation and gender identity in all primary grade levels. “If we have no access to information about how our classmates choose to identify, then our only avenues to inflict emotional torture upon them will be socio-economic issues and physical attributes. Think about it: how are we supposed to pressure LGBTQ students into killing themselves on Snapchat and Instagram if we don’t even know who they are?” At press time, the bill had reportedly been amended to appease bullies by requiring LGBTQ students to wear an identifying patch on their outer clothing at all times.