SAN FRANCISCO—With yet another offering aimed at promoting men’s sense of well-being and self-confidence, the health brand Hims announced Friday it would begin a monthly gun-delivery service for customers who refused to be emasculated any longer. “All you need to do is create a Hims account, answer a few questions about how society has robbed you of your manhood and someone must pay dearly, and we’ll set you up each month with a gun that suits your needs,” said CEO Andrew Dudum, explaining that customers could easily bundle their Hims mental health and hair-loss prevention products with a 9 mm Glock or an AR-15 that would be delivered in discreet packaging to their front door. “Did you know six out of 10 men say a feminized America has taken everything that is rightfully theirs? Luckily, there are many different calibers and magazine sizes to help. And we want men out there to know they don’t need to be embarrassed about getting help with their violent urges.” In addition to a firearm’s ability to help customers reassert control when they are fed up with the world, Dudum added that, for certain men, holding a loaded gun remained the only effective treatment for erectile dysfunction.
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