
Many Americans use the MPAA’s formalized rating system as a guide for which films to see. The Onion provides a step-by-step view into how these ratings are chosen:
STEP 1
Esteemed MPAA executives get together for a viewing of Paddington 2, The Lego Batman Movie, and Saw: Legacy
STEP 2
Board member revived with smelling salts after protagonist utters the term “motherfucker”
STEP 3
Cohort of children under 17 are exposed to the film and then studied for a decade to observe potentially adverse effects over time
STEP 4
Dismembered torsos in scene 36 examined for any obscene nipple exposure
STEP 5
White smoke billows from highest window of MPAA headquarters, indicating to the expectant crowd below that a rating has been chosen
STEP 6
Director immediately rails against the selected rating in order to secure a juicy anecdote for DVD’s audio commentary track
STEP 7
Intrepid preteens duck into illicit theater right after tickets checked