‘I Want To Go See Those Mountains Where It Looks Like Avatar,’ Says Biden In Speech Outlining Foreign Policy Agenda

Illustration for article titled ‘I Want To Go See Those Mountains Where It Looks Like Avatar,’ Says Biden In Speech Outlining Foreign Policy Agenda

WASHINGTON—Vowing to provide the State Department with the funding and resources it required to pursue his administration’s goals, President Joe Biden announced “I want to go see those mountains where it looks like Avatar” in a speech Thursday outlining his foreign policy agenda. “The foundational principles of the next four years of diplomacy are restoring America’s place as a world leader, and getting to see those floating sky mountains from Avatar up close,” said Biden, adding that he had already reached out to James Cameron and the location scouts from Avatar to schedule a meeting in those mountains and improve diplomatic relations with “those big blue cat guys.” “In addition, my administration will not hesitate to pursue America’s interests in wondering how they found all those amazing hobbit hideaways in The Lord Of The Rings, as well as uncovering all intelligence about how they got bears to play musical instruments at Disney World. Thank you.” Biden also announced that a crucial part of his foreign policy agenda was containing China by ensuring that they didn’t get anywhere near those mountains from Avatar and “the secret gold or life force or whatever” that they contained inside.