APPLETON, WI—Utterly disregarding the Centers for Disease Control’s Covid-19 safety guidelines, irresponsible neighbor Edith Bernstein, 94, was having a ton of visitors over to her house, local sources reported Friday. “Who the hell does she think she is hosting a gathering like that while cases are skyrocketing?” said next-door neighbor Laura Perkins, adding that she noticed the get-together after she woke up to blaring sirens and spotted the group hanging out in front of Bernstein’s house next to an ambulance. “Jesus, some people are so selfish. She has all kinds of visitors going in and out of there, and they’re not even trying to maintain proper social distance! Not to mention that an older person in a high-risk category really shouldn’t be letting guests make physical contact with her, even if they are wearing full PPE.” At press time, Perkins had reportedly called the police, hoping they would disperse the emergency vehicles outside Bernstein’s home.
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