ISIS Documents Reveal Financial Strain

Recently obtained internal documents reveal that ISIS militants currently face a 50 percent pay cut and that several were chastised for obtaining doctors’ notes to avoid frontline duty. What do you think?

“Hopefully they’ve all been keeping their resumés up to date.”

Gavin Doler • Beading Enthusiast


“They must be feeling pretty silly for destroying all those priceless Mesopotamian artifacts right about now.”

Brenna Magnussen • Parquet Installer

“I’m not worried. The U.S. will find a way to accidentally finance them.”

Reid Ware • Vault Supervisor