NEW YORK—Lauding the incredible acumen required to obtain access to the subject of her new biography, Confidence Man: The Making Of Donald Trump And The Breaking Of America, journalists nationwide marveled Wednesday at Maggie Haberman’s ability to get a man who never shuts up to respond to her questions. “Wow, I can’t believe she got that guy to give her three interviews for her book—that’s incredible!” New York Times columnist Aaron Wells said in reference to a man who loves seeing his name in print, never stops chasing after the spotlight, and appears not to have censored a single one of his thoughts in the past 76 years. “How did she get [a person who prattles on endlessly in social media posts and, during large public rallies, will muse aloud for a couple hours at a time in front of strangers] to talk to her that much? I wish I knew her secret.” At press time, journalists were reportedly amazed once more upon learning that a man known for speaking in an unfiltered stream-of-consciousness and for casually revealing highly classified intelligence to hostile nations had called Haberman and asked her to write another 608 pages about him.
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